arthurcorgi

neat snacks

In my job you have to get out of the office and pee on the tires if you want to know what is really going on.  There are a lot of stupid health laws, so I do not get to very many grocery stores.  I have to sit in the car and watch what the fat bipeds are putting in their trunks. 

Yesterday I noticed a lot of Pringles potato chips.  As luck would have it, the boss bought a can of original flavor.  There are 89 cents on sale from 1.29. 

I am a chili cheese fries man myself, and I am really fussy about potato chips.  For example, I do not like ridges, WOW chips or cheap store brands. 

Management threw me a couple of Pringles original flavor chips, because I was getting on her nerves barking.  They were quite excellent for a pressed potato product.  Also they are neat.  You cannot sit on the bag by accident because they come in a can.

Procter & Gamble makes Pringles.  Also, they make Cheer laundry soap.  We do not use Cheer.  We use Tide. 

But we like Pringles when they are on sale for 89 cents a can.

Trouble's just a bubble**

You have a lot of poor people to thank for the mess in your portfolio if you are like the author of this soon-to-be-discovered blog.  (Are you reading this, Tracey?  Any day now Random House will be calling, and it’ll be toot-a-loo, Trac, if you catch my drift.)  Like a trash can with no steak bones, the market is made up of junk mail and coffee grounds, and it is because of liberal

California

bankers giving money to illegal aliens and communists. 

That is why I started the Arthur Corgi Closed-End Castle Fund.  They already have a fund called Windsor and Kensington.  Also probably Balmoral.   You need a shelter in the storm.  And I want to cash in on the collapse. 

The Castle Fund invests in firms with a proprietary service, such as a license to steal.  We look for products that can survive in a recession, such as cheap wine and pork and beans. Frito-Lay and Interstate Bakeries Corporation, makers of Hostess Twinkies, are on our “buy” list, because I, chief portfolio strategist, am never wrong about snacks.   

Poor people do not understand portfolios, pedigree dogs or which fork to use in case the White House invites you over to dinner.  Also they should have stayed in their nice, comfortable refrigerator box in the park or on

Lower Wacker Drive

.  (That is in

Chicago

.)  What more do they want?  Some of them even had a stolen shopping cart with all their smelly junk.  Now they have an empty house, and they cannot pay their mortgage.  They are bad planners, because they did not keep their refrigerator box, and they sold their shopping cart to the scrap metal dealer so they could buy a new remote for their HD TV. 

You cannot hook up a TV in the park.  But you can open a can of pork and beans if they have those pull tabs.  You can use a stick for a fork. 

Resourcefulness.  That’s what made American great.

**Just around the corner
There's a rainbow in the sky
So let's have another cup o' coffee
And let's have another piece o' pie!

Trouble's just a bubble
And the clouds will soon roll by
So let's have another cup o' coffee
And let's have another piece o' pie

Let a smile be your umbrella
For it's just an April show'r
Even John D. Rockefeller
Is looking for the silver lining

Mister Herbert Hoover
Says that now's the time to buy
So let's have another cup o' coffee
And let's have another piece o' pie!

--Irving Berlin--

Rap for Elaine

Rap for Elaine

The Corgiz gotta Queen.

She a bling bling brick.

They know the hedge fund houndz

gonna sink the bitch ship.

A hedge be like a Bush.

It ain’t no bank account.

The ballers got yo’ scratch

and yo’ losses mount.

A hedge a kinda hog.

It eat yo’ money up.

You don’t get nothin’ back

Til they pass the cup.

This dawg know somethin’ chill.

He down to bust the con.

A hedge be like the Shrubbery

that you pee upon.

Sucka …