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D.F. Facti

I love Mr. Chickadee's cousin, the tufted titmose. Bohemian waxwings here - - - I should write about it.


I have raised about a dozen wild birds. Of course, the hard part is teaching them to survive beyond "domestication." They are all different.

I found out that boattailed grackels are "songbirds" only to those who've never been bitten by one. They are hawks disguised as startlings!

The crows and jays are the hardest. They seem to want to be people.


I wish she'd get off the damned computer so I could answer email and write my column.

I suppose Fluff is a bird watcher, too.


Hey Arthur. Heidi is my thirteen year old coonhound. She forces me to walk her about ten miles a day, but my doctor says that will keep me alive longer than any vitamin. Probably so. She certainly does not look threatening, but I assure you she is totally a shark on four legs. She can catch any bird, squirrel, you name it. She loves every human, which is sometimes worrisome to me. But if I don't keep her on a short leash, she will come back with a pheasant for sure every time. She once caught a rabbit in a bush on a seven foot leash. At least she always kills them instantly. What can I do?


Dear Blues,
Chocolate is always a good idea. You cannot go wrong with M&M's or a full-sized Snickers.

Have you thought about starting a fan club and newsletter? That worked well for me and the boss. Sign up all the humans - get the money up front and do not promise too much.

The worst things I ever did were eating catnip mice and rolling a little kid on Halloween.

Maybe when Dr. Phil is through not helping Britney Spears, he could not help you.


Damn! You've nailed it, Corgi!!! I gotta call the DR. Phil franchise RIGHT NOW. Just think; I get paid to get exposed as the scrumhole I may be, plus I get all that great advice. I need to start yet another website devoted to exposing Dr. Phil and his scrumhole for what it all truly is.

This could be my big break on the internet. Exposing the DR. Phil / Scientology conspiracy! I'm on a roll for this one, baby!!!

Elaine Supkis

Alas, cats specialize in psychiatry and hypnosis but none of this works on DOGS.


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