Jesus Skated Ice And Judas Was His Best Friend

Elaine Meinel Supkis

A scientist comes up with a charming explanation for Jesus walking on water and an ancient Coptic text that was found 30 years ago is finally translated. It claims, Judas was a good guy and wanted to help Jesus fulfill his destiny.

National Geographic:

Amitabh Avasthi
for National Geographic News
April 6, 2006
A freak cold spell that covered parts of a lake with ice could explain the biblical tale about Jesus walking on water, says a team of U.S. and Israeli scientists.

But several experts have questioned the scientific basis of the study, and many have dismissed the findings as implausible.

Jesus really worked with the Ice Capades. He invented the triple toe loop and the hamill camel. He attempted quads but was unable to land them because of interference from the authorities who arrested him for preaching without a license and turning over temple tables, releasing a flock of doves and spilling coins into the gutter.

Messing with money and religious leaders is dangerous.

Agence Frence Presse:

Lost for almost 1,700 years, a manuscript entitled "Gospel of Judas" is putting a new spin on the case of the biblical bad guy, maintaining that Jesus actually asked disciple Judas to betray him.

The third- or fourth-century ancient Coptic manuscript -- authenticated, translated and displayed Thursday at National Geographic headquarters here -- paints a different picture of Judas and Jesus.

The only known surviving copy of the Gospel of Judas, contained in a papyrus manuscript known as a codex, maintains, as the Bible does not, that Jesus requested that Judas "betray" him by handing him to authorities for execution, something it says pained Judas greatly.

National Geographic said the key passage in the Gospel of Judas text comes when Jesus tells Judas "... you will exceed all of them. For you will sacrifice the man that clothes me."

The text indicates that Judas, by helping Jesus get rid of his physical flesh, will help liberate the true spiritual self or divine being within, National Geographic said in a statement.

Sort of like your drinking buddy driving you off the road and getting both of you arrested and then after springing himself out of the hootch, turns around and tells the cops you were driving the car when it ran over the mayor's mother who was crossing the street.

Well, the entire Bible is a mushy mess written over many years by many people. It is not consistent nor makes much sense in places but it is like the earth, many layers and meanings with sudden shifts in geography and materials. Over layering all this is a thick layer of many coats of mythology, other religions redesigned to fit into the Jewish based mythologies, fairy tales and credulous fantasies. A theological mess which has led to thousands of years of hot disputes. Now we can have some more!

Of course, the concept of "god" as embodied in many religions is very problematical since virtually all of them feature some really nasty entities which remind me of demons. Killing, raping, taunting humans, a scary crew, virtually all gods are dangerous and treacherous. The whole point in carefully worshipping these many different gods was so they would be appeased and perhaps would not do hideous things to their supplicants, perhaps, even reward them after torturing humans that didn't bow and scrape sufficiently.

Which is what really depresses me. I can see someone believing that betraying Jesus to the authorities was something Jesus wanted since he wanted to enjoy a violent death so he could become a god, you certainly will not see me doing this. It really isn't worth it.

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Comments

[D.F.Facti]

Elaine-
Just a drive-by. Unfortunately.

Aren't you about to celebrate 1 year as the boss of Culture of Life News?

By the way, this Judas Gospel business ...

The gnostic gospel writers - some of them - were neo-Platonists. Flesh is bad, imperfect, an impediment. Spirit is the perfect state. According to Plato. Major projection going on, in other words.

[Elaine Meinel Supkis]

You missed the celebration, Facti. Thanks to your workload. But I saved you a slice of the cake, except Akamaru found it and ate it. The chickens polished up the crumbs.

Perhaps we can have tea together some time.